This Feels Wierd
Complicated Grief Through Bloodshot Eyes (Part 2)
There’s this duality to everything I’ve experienced in the last week. Aching heartache. Overwhelming relief. A constant lump in my throat and a very limited ability to actually cry. Remorse. Joy. Gladness and anger. Confusion. Raw, savage clarity—the kind you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy. Goes something like this. Trigger (and there’s a million […]
What the Fuck?
Complicated Grief Through Bloodshot Eyes
“I don’t know man.” “This sucks.” “What the fuck.” “I just don’t get it.” “I don’t know.” I have repeated each of these about a billion times since Friday afternoon. For a period it felt like all I was capable of saying. It’s Monday. My husband had to go back to work, and I have […]
Maybes and Adolescent Optimism.
When I was a little girl, Heaven was a very clear view in my mind. A gleaming city with golden streets, up and down which angels marched, blasting their trumpets in eternal celebration. A place out of every utopian fantasy. A place with no suffering, eternal worship, and peace. As I grew older, my worldly […]
Channeling Anxiety into Productivity and Creativity
I love those funny YouTube videos: stress/anxiety as a person that follows you around and ruins your day. It’s a cute analogy. If my anxiety was a person, she wouldn’t be the all-in-black, vampiric, nightmare that usually comes to mind. If my anxiety was a person, she’d be a Mary-Sue. A bright, peppy, middle-aged white […]
My Experience With Mental Illness and Creativity
As a Mutual Partnership.
Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like my atypical brain has contributed to my life in insurmountable ways, namely through my ability to think outside the box. If the box is “normalcy”, I’ve spent my life trying to fit into it, like a cat that found an empty twelve-pack. Except, I don’t fit. I […]
Three Tips to Improve Your Writing
I used to think that writing was somehow a gift and you were just supernaturally blessed with the mystical power of word manipulation or you weren’t. As a cocky teenager, eager to be better at something than everyone else, I believed I was blessed with that power. But for years I wrote, and stopped, and […]
And a Joke
And Eating Them Anyway
I hope no one ever reads my first novel. Besides my husband, who sat with me through each budding phase of its creation, with enough patience that he should be indoctrinated into the hall of saints. The patron saint of my neurosis maybe. I hope no one ever sits down, reads my first-attempt, and thinks: […]
This is where it all begins
Hi, I’m Rose. I’ve never had one of these snazzy websites before so I’m not sure what I’m doing. I’ll try to keep this brief. I am almost thirty, a wife, and a mother. I like writing my thoughts down and I’m good at rambling for long periods. Often, my mouth gets away with me […]